Week 5 Recap

Weekly High Score Bonus

Andy takes home the $10 bonus this week, putting up 185.3 points against DJ, who just can not catch a break. Interestingly, no one has repeated the weekly bonus yet, DJ, Jason and Matt have not won yet, and may never will.

Biggest Blowout Bonus

Chris takes the lead away from Adam, blowing out Matt  by 77.1 points, and Matt even started a complete lineup!

Win’s a Win Bonus

No Change

Survivor

It’s down to the sexy six of Adam, Chris, DJ, Josh, Rob and Andy.

Andy must be safe, with his 185 score this week. DJ and Josh are probably the most likely to be eliminated, with 123 and 133 points respectively. But Adam, Chris and Rob are certainly not safe, a 40 point swing is not out of the question. We’ll see what happens in week 6.

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THE Gimpledaumus (JOSH) vs Puttin’ on the Ritz (ADAM)

This matchup didn’t bother with the theatrics of Thursday or Monday night suspense—it was pure Sunday carnage. Josh is hoarding QBs with Jayden Daniels, Patrick Mahomes and Kyler Murray, while Adam is hoarding Seahawks with Geno Smith, Kenneth Walker, DK Metcalf, Zach Charbonnet and Jason Myers, the ridiculous fanboy.

While Josh posted a respectable score, Adam unleashed Ja’Marr Chase, who went full cheat code with 41 points, practically winning the game single-handedly. Adam sits pretty at 4-1 and in first place, while Josh, despite his solid effort, finds himself chilling just outside the playoff picture in 5th. His Points For of 666.65 keeps him above Jason, but that does not feel like a lucky number…..

nWo4LIFE (DJ) vs Tua 3, 4 Concussions (ANDY)

DJ caught a nasty case of the Bye Week Bug, with four of his key players taking the week off. It’s also worth asking why he dropped Drake London, because London’s 33 points would’ve come in handy (spoiler: they still wouldn’t have saved him). Andy came out swinging, with Lamar Jackson and Darnell Mooney getting  30+ points each. To pour salt in the wound, Andy’s defense outscored every player on DJ’s team except his quarterback. Ouch.

With this win, Andy slips into the 4th playoff spot, while DJ’s team falls back, searching for a cure to his bye-week blues.

Tua-Tang Clan (MATT) vs The Josh Allen Show (CHRIS)

The clearest indication that this matchup was never really a contest was that Chris was just 10 points away from doubling Matts score. Five of Matt’s players scored in the single digits, and his Defense was in the negative. Chris benefitted from DJ’s questionable decision to drop Drake London, snapping him up as he dropped 33.4 points, not that it was really needed.

While Josh Allen hasn’t quite lived up to the show's name, Chris finds himself at 3-2, while Matt languishes in the basement of 8th place, where he’s all too familiar.

Team Cady (ROB) vs Trash Panda (JASON)

Now this was a nail-biter. Despite having four injured players, Rob threw down the gauntlet with 144.3 points, daring Jason to catch up. Jason, 30 points behind, was salivating like a man at an all-you-can-eat hot pepper buffet, waiting for his Monday night heroes—Travis Kelce and Xavier Worthy—to save him.

In the end, Jason came up just 1.5 points short, leaving him licking his wounds and probably reaching for a cold beer... Rob snags the win and sits comfortably in 2nd place, while Jason’s Monday night dreams were left in the dust.

Current Standings

And there you have it—week 5 is in the books, and the league is starting to take shape. We've got some teams soaring to the top while others are floundering, still searching for that magic lineup. With no undefeated teams left and everyone in the win column, it's clear that no one’s safe from an upset. As we head into the mid-season grind, it's time to buckle up—things are only going to get wilder from here!